What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Miscarriages.

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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How do u make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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A women in the kitchen.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

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why did the photographer take so many pictures? Because he gets paid.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops