What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

A Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They end up getting into a heated argument. After about an hour of back and forth they decide that each person has a valid point, agree to disagree, and go about there business.

Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

What's worse than being a Packer fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... Oh, wait...

What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

What comes after 69... Mouthwash

How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

Why did the chicken cross the buffet table? To get to the other sides.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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