How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

What did the cop say to the man arrested for speeding? You were going over the speed limit sir, I'm going to have to give you a ticket for that.

what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

Knock knock who's there I killed your family

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

What do you get when you mix Obama and Chief Keef? OBLLAMA

The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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