Q: What's worse than spilling milk all over the floor? A: Cleaning up the milk you spilled all over the floor.

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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21

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

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Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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