Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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Should a pole bump an alarm?

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the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

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why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops