Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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Wanna hear a funny anti joke?...........................................................................................Funny anti joke

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

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Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

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In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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i had sex.

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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