Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

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Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

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What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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Oh, right

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

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Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

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Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

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Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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Why was the woman sad? Because her son died.

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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