I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops