Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

what long green and bumpy? a pickle

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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