why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

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what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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When the loaf of bread crashed the car the wife was mad. What do you think she did? She put Nutella on him toasted him and then ate him

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Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops