A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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Women's rights.

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What do Jim Carrey, Kim Jing-un and Justin Bieber have in common? A penis.

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Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

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A Black man walks into a gay bar. He has a great time because he is perfectly content with his sexuality.

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knock knock come in !

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes, how may I help you?

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? They do. In fact, seagulls can be found near almost any body of water.

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What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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