Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

get in the car.

What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

What did the black man say when he waked into KFC? Can I use the restroom?

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

The Charlotte Bobcats

What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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