A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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Steve jumps through a window...he forgot he was on the 231st floor...He dies

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What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

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A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

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Whats worse than being rapped by a giant scorpion. Being gangbanged by a couple giant scorpions

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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i tried logging into my ipad. turns out, it was an etch a sketch, and i dont own an ipad. also, im out of vodka.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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