What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a stupid chicken wandering around.

Get up Look in the mirror

Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

Canadians

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

You have friends

Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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