- Anti Joke

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Knock knock who's there I killed your family

Is Yered a dumbass? YA

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Knock knock who's there I killed your family

Is Yered a dumbass? YA

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Phone rings Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400