Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

like this if you think what ever you want to..

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried. The chicken was run over by a distracted driver. The chicken turned out to be Farmer Brendan's prized egg hen who wandered away. The hen provided a large portion of Brendan's income and living. The farmer, deprived of his vital income source, was forced to sell his farm and live on the city streets.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

what's brown and sticky? A Stick

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

Beth got an aunt farm for her birthday.

Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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