Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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Did you here about the man who dropped a glass? It broke.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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why did'n the baby wake up from his nap? because he was dead

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I'm sorry sally your grandmother is dead. LOL _ grandpa Laugh out loud!. I can't belive you. I thought it meant lots of love Grandpa-ha funny mistake though right?

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Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

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How do you get a one armed polock out of a tree? You assess the situation and get a ladder the proper size to reach him, making sure the ladder is stable.

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"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

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What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

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Q: what do u call a plane that flies A: a plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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A: my name is Joe and i like onion B: ok

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Why was the gay guy sad?

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What are jews without the holocaust? Alive

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops