How do you stop a bus ? Put 3 small children in front of it Whats sad about 3 children who died in a bus crash ? They were my kids. How do you know if you're blind ? You run in to a wall

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

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What is long and black? The line at KFC

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Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

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What was hitlers least favorite pokemon? Hitler didnt have a least favorite pokemon because hitler died long before the idea of pokemon was created.

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What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

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a horse walks into a bar. the barman asks "why the long face". not understanding human language, the horse takes a shit, neighs then leaves

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What's the difference between a stepfather and a turkey? A stepfather is a man who married a woman who has already had a family with another man but the man does not mind because he has fallen deeply in love with her and wants to spend the rest of his life with the woman. A turkey is completely different in many respects.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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Why does annie put 2 balls together? bacuse its makes a BUTT! oo

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops