Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

What did the old man say? Im old

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

Link ate ink to make him sink.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

What happened to the man who bought his son a birthday gift? He eventually was robbed and shot in the face

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the world. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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