The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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Knock knock Go away

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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What was Hellen Kellers biggest mistake? Knock knock jokes

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

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Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

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Why did this website get run into the dirt? Because you they let idiots like me post whatever I want. _CamelJocky

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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lewis=cardiac

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knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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