Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

why is this joke funny because your laughing

Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

What do you call Rosa Parks? One bitchy negro. Just kidding she was a visionary for human rights, now you can't dislike this cause you'll be saying that Rosa Parks wasn't a visionary, take that blacks.

black people

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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