What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

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What did the boy get for christmas? a new lining

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

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What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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your mom's so fat that even the biggest case of cancer couldn't brake through her flubber its so big

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Lars Arne Eriksen (Yes his real name) is filing a case against me (because he believes that my actions (from my private estate-ish bigger) are shaming the firm.... Now, can anyone of you randomeers, tell me what firm I represent? Which firm I am not employed at but OWN, meaning that I am the one that will be evaluating if his case is valid? ERIKSEN YOU FUCKING DUMBASS YOU CAN LEAVE NOW YOU ARE NOT GETTING PAID FOR READING THESE COMMENTS AND SENDING THEM TO YOUR BOSS... ...BECAUSE I AM YOUR BOSS YOU FUCKING DUMBASS! NOW TYPE THIS DOWN, TAKE YOUR LITTLE PICTURES AND SEND THEM TO ME, SO I CAN SAY OFFICIALLY THEM "YOU SUCK YOU ARE FIRED" Now, feel free to post what Lawfirm I not only represent but own 99.9 of, if anyone guesses right, I will send you ten fucking million USD, and quit my position, if not I fire Eriksen and... (ill do that anyways Eriksen, you are not getting paid today, go home, we shall speak of this later, consider yourself on the way of getting officially fired. Not for having fun like we are here (you know at my tiny house here) THE HUGE ONE, but for embarrasing yourself and attempting to... Sigh, shame your boss by reporting him not to your boss, but to your the lead attorney... FUCKING DUMBASS I AM THE LEAD ATTORNEY WHICH MEANS THAT THIS IS WHY YOU CALL ME BOSS! According to this little dialer, twelve people from our firm are watching this site because we are having fun, and you just ridiculed yourself all in front of them. Dont show your face at my firm again dumbass, you can keep working until I officially let you go, but you wont get any pay from the official work. Guys at work, explain him how he cannot file a complaint about me, to myself for shaming a law firm whose nobody knows I AND ONLY I PROPERLY REPRESENT! Go home Eric crapton, make sure he leaves guys, thank you very much.

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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