What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

Why are Jews always so clean? Because they never come out of the shower.

what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

Its Erron, listen, we got to talk, I do not mind your pictures, but I am not going to call you because of that weird spot on your face, its just 101 basics here, I suggest you shut down the access to this site to the rest of your employees, this might get very personal.

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

What is black and white and cant get through revolving doors? A zebra with a spear through its head.

What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

Knock Knock, Ow my face

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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