My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

What do you call a black person who can't see? Blind

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware River? Men, to the boats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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