What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

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Who has no penis Religious Believers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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knock knock come in !

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why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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What's black and sits in the back of a police car? The seat.

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What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

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Why did the black guy sing? Cause he can sdf sdfsd f sdf ds f sd fsd f sd f ds g sdfgh fsh sdf h dfsg dfs g df gdfgdf g d yeah thats right

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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How do you get an alien baby to sleep? Well, first you need to get an alien baby.

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knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

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No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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Women's rights.

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops