Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

Three baby seals walk into a club...

boy and girl are flipping a coin, coin lands on heads, boy: get down bitch

Racial Equality

Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

Justin Bieber

A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

Boob

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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