What do you say to a black guy who is holding a gun to your head? Nothing. He is holding a gun to your head.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

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a man walks into the bar and say, OUCH!!

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why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

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Womens rights.

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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