What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

thumb_up thumb_down -19

can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -19

69

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

thumb_up thumb_down -19

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

thumb_up thumb_down -19

We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops