whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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a Polar bear in an Igloo.

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What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

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What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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i went to the bar. soon after i entered the bar i got kicked out. why? becuase i'm seventeen.

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Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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