Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

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A man walks into a bar, asks for a drink. He then realises that it was a metal bar and not one that serves alcoholic beverages. He then ponders the mysteries of the world and the universe.

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when life throws you lemons you should watch out or you might get hurt.

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A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple

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In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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when i'm away from home i sometimes get love sick, well they call it chlamydiae.

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

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A blonde is rowing a boat in a cornfield. While driving by, another blonde notices and pulls over and steps out of her car. She looks out and yells "You know, it's blondes like you that are giving us a bad name. If you weren't so far out, I would swim out there and beat the shit outta you!"

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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