knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

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ask me if im deaf. are you deaf? ...............

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

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Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

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Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

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why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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