Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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I did not thumb this up myself!... *click* Whoops! At least I am not that douche Moral Man eh? Moral: Whoops! Now if I just don't accidentally type in the answer and...

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these are shit

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Error 37.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

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So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

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roses are red violets are blue i just made you remember two girls one cup

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Female Orgasms

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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