Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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8--------------------- penis

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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i hate black people

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Black people deserve to be slaves for their entire lives. WHITE POWER.

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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The man was driving down the road at an opropriat speed and got t-boned. The women in the other car got out and tried to help the man but the man was already out of the car and call 911

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How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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hello

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

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There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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