Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a woman starring at him, she seems attractive... he walks up to her and realizes that sheis quite mediocre if not even ugly. He proceeds to say "You'll do"

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p

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Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

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what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

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What did one muffin say to the other? I'm baked... just kidding muffins are food and therefore can not speak

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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