Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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you dint have to be a jew matt

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Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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;iub

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What's green, smelly, and in a swamp? Casey Anthony's Baby

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Roxanne's hat looks like a condom

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Q: Whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion A: Getting raped by three giant scorpion's

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How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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