Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

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it's funny because it's funny

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

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Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

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I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

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all the kids had fun

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops