Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

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Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

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what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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