Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

What do you get if you cross a football with Theo Walcott? A goal kick.

I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

What do black people and white people have in common? They are both mentioned in this box

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

How do the Kardashians change a light bulb? They buy a new mansion

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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