what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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dassa

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There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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why did the Chinese man fail the driving test because he had no previous driving experience and wasn't prepared for the test

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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