What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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What's worse than being a Packer fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... Oh, wait...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call two black men sitting on the porch? Craig and Smokey

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

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An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

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What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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