Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

Q.Anti-jokes are funny? A.Depends on your opinion

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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