- Anti Joke

whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

Women

Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

Why is meth so addicting? Why? Hang on, i gotta go do some meth

Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig