You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

Whats white and can't climb trees? Yogurt.

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

womens rights.

What did the down syndrome girl get for christmas? Cancer.

When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

F? No k

When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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