Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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Leave. Now.

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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The awkward moment when something of quite awkwardness occurs.

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you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What did the Catholic priest say after he fell off a cliff? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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womens rights.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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My love life

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Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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angelosnyder is not gay

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

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Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops