Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

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A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

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Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Obama being reelected.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

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Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

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What did the little boy get from his visit to Penn State? Raped.

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Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

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Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

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Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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