what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

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What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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A man walks into a bar with tears rolling down his cheeks. The bartender asks why are you so blue? The man says he has blue skin disorder and that everyone has been making fun of him...

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Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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