What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

What do animals eat at the beach? Sandwitches

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

knock knock go away!!!

your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

hi

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

F? No k

whats black white and red all over an abused child

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

when trouble come down in your neighborhood who you gonna call? the local law enforcement or another form of personal protection

where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...