why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

2 Black men walk into the bar.. Guess what? There still black.

What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

A. THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE B. WHAT?!? *PUNCH* A. IT WAS PAINNNNNNNNN

whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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