wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Yo mamas so dumb she has to repeat the 10th grade...again.

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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why did radio not get the song? beacause he radio didnt work.

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What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

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Why couldn't little Jimmy see his mum in the crowd? Because he was blind.

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

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What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

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LeBron James proposes. So what does he put on the girls finger? Ben L.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well, one must question: 1. How much the electrician knows when it comes to screwing in lightbulbs. 2. The amount of electricians present at the scene. 3. The type of equipment being used in the process. 4. The physical and mental stability of the electrician. The situation is solely dependent on the above factors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops