Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? He has flourished throughout his musical career and is a very accomplished man, as he has won many Grammys

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Womens rights.

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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