What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what goes woof ? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops