person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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The man decides to jump off the bridge and decides to make one last phone call. "Hello, Jane, this is Doug. I just wanted to let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I love you." Person on the phone says "This is not Jane, this is Joe." "Oh, hi, Joe. Could you just tell your wife what I said. Bye." The man continues to jump down the bridge and swims with his beautiful girlfriend. They all had a great day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

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Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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